‘There is a certain beauty in being the first and last of your kind, but no one can argue it’s fucking boring.’

We’re officially one week into the Phantom and Rook Read-Along, and I thought it’d be nice to have one place to organize all my thoughts. In case you didn’t know, I’m hosting a Read-Along that goes until the end of November. I’m doing this because I wanted to celebrate the one year anniversary of the book’s release, and to prepare for the sequel’s release in January. You can get free ebooks by joining the Fable Book Club, and there’s also a Storygraph challenge. I’ve been sharing my annotations on Goodreads, and my thoughts on social media.

Without further ado, here is the summary of week one’s thoughts.

October 31st. Original Announcement Post.

On November 2nd, 2022, I published the book closest to my heart. While it is a cozy fantasy, Phantom and Rook explores deep topics like mental health, learning how to live long after you’ve become an adult, and falling in love despite all the things that might go wrong.

Since then an audiobook narrated by Kirt Graves was produced, and numerous libraries and bookstores put Phantom and Rook on their shelves, not only the print but ebook and audio versions as well. There are over 125 reviews on Goodreads, and over 30 on Amazon and Storygraph.

My ultimate goal was to provide an accessible story about happy queers, and I feel like I’ve done that and more. To celebrate, I’m hosting a read-along which starts tomorrow to coincide with the treasure hunt inside Phantom and Rook. I’m also giving away free ebooks for anyone who wants one, you don’t have to participate in the read-along to claim one. The link expires on November 1st.

You can participate in the read-along in any fashion you like. I have a Fable Book Club which has a place for members to discuss and share their annotations. There is also a Storygraph challenge with When Witches Sing as a bonus. I’ll be sharing my thoughts and annotations in the club, on social media, and Goodreads. If you simply want to read without sharing, that’s fine too! The schedule is simply a suggestion, and is the way it’s set up in Fable.

You can find all the links you need in my linktree and more, including a playlist for Phantom and Rook.

Thank you so much for supporting me, I appreciate each and every one of you.

November 1st.

“Let’s go out sometime, I owe you that much for making a mess of your things.”

He balks and the slightest bit of green swims to life in his eyes. A mischievous smile takes hold, but then he shakes his head, and the smile away. “Can’t, but thanks. Enjoy the festival.”

I open my lips but the owl chirps, a bizarre noise, and cracks open a yellow eye to glower at me. The man rolls his eyes at the bird, then glances back at me with a renewed emerald glow ringed around his irises.

He makes to leave, but I wring my hands and blurt out ridiculousness first. “I’d enjoy it much more with a local to show me around. I’m not … looking for anything, just a friend.” I manage to squeak out. Oh dear stars, am I blushing?

All I earn for my awkwardness is a seconds-long sly grin, then the back of his head as he walks away from me. Again.

I become a stone in the river, allowing the crowd to part around me. I wonder when the last time was that I experienced embarrassment. Have I ever been truly embarrassed?

Well, I certainly have now.

🍁🎃📚🏳️‍🌈✨

Day one into the Read-Along and I’m two chapters in! We’ve been introduced to Arlo’s life and his desire to move out and become a ‘real person,’ as he’s been healing from something in his past and hasn’t felt ready until now. After enchanting a group of children in the orphanage with a legend about a mysterious treasure hunt, he takes off for the market before meeting up with friends.

We’ve also met Thatch, the mysterious and wealthy immortal who delights in the little things. After purchasing a bookstore due to pure sentiment, although he’ll have us believe it’s practically, he goes for a walk through the market. He compares the town as it is now, to how it was decades prior. He becomes distracted by the festival decorations to the Scarlet Illusionist, the creator of the treasure hunt, and crashes into Arlo.

The immortal reminiscences over the witch he used to know, cataloging all the ways he’s changed, and prays to the powers that be that Arlo will remember him.

But he doesn’t, and the witch turns down Thatch’s offer for a night on the town. So begins the push and pull slow burn that is Phantom and Rook.

“I want to see the world. Took me so fuckin’ long to even think about it. ‘What would mama say?’ you know? She always said this place was enough, and it is, but … I want more. I want to go on adventures, Mr. Phantom, that’s why I want to sell. Silly, isn’t it? Leave this behind for some fantasy, at my age.”

I stare directly into his eyes. “Doing what you love isn’t silly. I admire you, Gleason, and I think you should do it.

November 2nd.

I am having the absolute best time, it’s a good mixture of pointing out clues and roasting the characters. I visited the local coffeehouse today, so I had to take obligatory book pictures to pay homage to Thitwhistle’s.

I find a lot of inspiration in people and places, especially cafes and libraries, and bookstores.

You see, for a brief moment in time, you get to exist with these people at the same place, the same time, despite having different lives and schedules and what have you.

You are allowed a momentary glimpse into other people, the way they take their coffee, or what books they tilt their head at a funny angle to look at. You can learn so much about someone in an act as simple as whether they left or a tip or held the door for you.

And this is all without speaking. Find the courage to actually speak with people, and you can expand your perspective even further.

Easy to say, not so easy to do.

Air whooshes out of me and time stops as I stare deep into them, right down to his soul, one that clearly does not remember me but calls to my heart all the same. It stings more than I thought it would.

November 3rd.

A comfortable silence rests between us as the world turns, oblivious to the qualms of queers hopelessly in love with their best friends.

🏳️‍🌈📚✨🍁

I love this line so much, I thought I was so clever when I wrote it. Is it okay to love your own writing so much?

I’m reading The Fire In Fiction by Donald Masses at the moment, and it talks about storytellers versus status seekers. Why authors write, and the feeling of reading something you can tell was passionately written. It is the highest achievement.

So yes, I think you can, and should, love your own writing. Because if you don’t, who will?

The thing is, I truly contemplated his offer, which in the past is something I’d never do. Sex with strangers is off the table for me, and love … love nearly killed me twice, and I’m not about to break myself open again. I give myself props for even thinking about it, then chastise myself for being such a coward. Lindsey’s probably right, he most likely wanted someone to show him around. If that ended in a quick fuck, would that have been a bad thing? Yes. I don’t think like this about people. And I know enough about myself to know that even a one night stand would crack its way into my heart and feelings would spill out onto the floor like they did before. 

November 5th.

“I don’t know, I’m just … tired of everyone worrying, waiting for me to fail. What’s the point in trying to … live if no one thinks you can do it? You can’t keep smothering me, Caspian, and you have to stop taking blame for what I did. I’m serious, I’m my own person.”

🏳️‍🌈✨🍁💊

We’re officially three chapters into the readalong, and in the tail end of Qualms of Queers, Arlo talks about his depression and previous attempt to take his life. One of the things that was important to me while writing this story was to portray mental health in an honest way, because I think we all need more stories with characters who are ‘invisibly’ struggling.

I pass by pictures of when Tobias and Caspian first started dating, two months after he and I stopped. I smile at the sight of Kitt and I photobombing them. The kids snore in my arms when I stop, looking deeper into my grinning face beside Kitt’s, both of us holding up bunny ears behind the couple’s heads. On closer inspection I note the date, frowning. Six years ago. There was nothing different about my face, except my cheeks were slimmer than they are now. I look away, avoiding the next span of years where I progressively look shittier, if I’m there at all. The two years before I ….